Nanny Alert: Signs You’re Getting Fired

Every nanny hopes that when they enter into a new nanny position that it will be a long-lasting one. However not all nanny jobs end up being a good fit for the families or the nanny. Unfortunately, some parents are unhappy with their nanny choice and decide to fire her and move onto a new person, or opt for a different type of care. It can happen during the first month or after a few years. No matter when it happens, getting fired is a disheartening blow. There are, however, some clues you can look for that can give you some advance warning. Your employer has repeatedly corrected the way you do a task, handle a situation, or your attitude. If your employers like you and feel you’re doing a great job in most areas, but have one area where they think you need to improve, the majority of the time they will try to talk with you about what they’re not happy with first. Official performance reviews or reprimands aren’t regularly used by nanny employers, so most feedback will come through informal conversations and comments. However, just because it feels casual doesn’t mean it’s not critical to the parent. For instance, your employer may take a couple of minutes in the morning to ask you to make more of an effort to get all the household chores done by the end of the day. If you’re still struggling to get things done before you leave in the evening, she might ask why you didn’t get the laundry finished or clean-up the play room. However it’s presented, it’s important for

you to take the concerns your employer has seriously. If she feels she’s talked about the problem with you but you haven’t corrected it, her next step may be to find a nanny who can better meet her needs and expectations. Your employer starts to distance herself from your personal relationship. Parents typically don’t like to fire their nanny, and even when they’re not happy with the nanny’s performance and feel confident that letting her go is the best decision it can still be hard to do. They worry about how it will affect their children, and often struggle to find ways to make the transition as easy as possible on their family. Parents are also usually genuinely concerned for the nanny. Many employers like and care for their nanny on a personal level even when she’s not great at her job. If your employer begins to distance herself from your personal relationship there’s a chance she’s preparing herself for the end of your professional relationship. The emotional distance helps her stay in employer mode and make decisions based on your job performance rather than her friendly feelings toward

you. It also eases the stress and anxiety that firing someone brings up. It’s a lot easier mentally and emotionally to fire a bad employee than it is to fire a nice person trying to do a good job. Your employer’s overall attitude toward you takes a negative turn. Negative emotions tend to spill over into other parts of a relationship, and this is especially true

for nanny/family relationships because the relationship has both personal and professional aspects. When your employer is feeling angry, frustrated, disappointed, or impatient with you she expresses that through her tone of voice, body language, attitude, and, of course, what she says to you. If the problem isn’t being directly or successfully addressed, she may increasingly give you the cold shoulder, micro-manage your day, find fault with new or unimportant things, or criticize you personally. These negative behaviors are a sign that her tolerance for the situation is reaching its limit and a change may come soon. Even though you try, you just can’t meet your employer’s expectations. Sometimes, your best just isn’t good enough for a particular situation. Maybe you simply don’t have the right skills to meet your employer’s needs. Maybe your definition of an organized play room, a well-rounded day, or an effective discipline approach doesn’t line up with hers. Maybe your personality doesn’t mesh with hers. If your employer has talked with you about a problem and you’ve made a real effort to do things differently, but your employer still isn’t happy, there’s a good chance she’ll start to look for a new nanny. In every unsuccessful nanny employment relationship there’s that point when the parent realizes that it just isn’t going to work. Once that point is reached, the parent usually begins the search for a new caregiver. You see things that point to a new nanny search. A nanny doesn’t have to snoop to see clues of a nanny search. A candidate calls and leaves a detailed message on the family’s answering machine. A large envelope from the local placement agency arrives in the mail. The kids talk about meeting a new ‘friend” over the weekend and it sounds very much like an interview. When you know there are problems on the job, those things can point to an active job search by your nanny family. Being fired is never easy. But it doesn’t mean you’re a bad nanny or person. It also doesn’t mean it’s the end of your relationship with the children you’ve cared for and come to love. With some effort you can make the transition smooth for everyone involved. If there’s a bright spot to leaving, it’s the knowledge that you can still have a close relationship with your former charges, should the parents allow.

0saves

Save

If you enjoyed this post, please consider leaving a comment or subscribing to the RSS feed to have future articles delivered to your feed reader.

Comments are closed.